To my fellow writers, readers, and to the mouse living in my kitchen wall:
It’s December, Nanowrimo just ended, and it’s cold enough to freeze the tits off a polar bear. (Although considering the impact of global warming on polar populations, that’s not true anymore, and I should probably remove that colloquialism from my arsenal.) Anyways, it’s cold enough that the geese are no longer floating on the lake, they’re walking on it.
You’re tired, I’m tired, and there’s an uncomfortable sinus pressure building behind my left eye that’s whispering discouraging things like, “You’re probably getting the flu or a sinus infection.” (You read that right. My sinuses are whispering to me.)
Also, as I write this, there is a squirrel, mouse, or chipmunk building a nest in my kitchen wall. Why this tiny fiend has not descended into its winter torpor yet, I may never know, but I do know that it’s extremely hard to write while it’s scratching its own novel in morse code on the drywall.
Oh, and before you’re all, “Oh, Annelise, you filthy monster! You allow rodents into your home?” No, no I do not. It (not they) is in the wall, not in my actual kitchen. And let me remind you, I live in an old building in the countryside, which was thoughtlessly planted on top of their burrows, and generations later, they’re seeking revenge. So, yeah. There’s that.
In any event, today I am here to remind you that it’s okay to take a day off now and then. The holidays are coming up, and things are getting crazy, so forgive yourself if you need to go to bed early or sleep in late.
Let yourself have one beautiful day in your pajamas. Make some Russian Tea, watch Netflix, read a book, or don’t do a damn thing. See if I care.
Just let yourself breathe.
And if you need an excuse to skip work, tell your boss that you ate Romaine lettuce last night. They’ll assume you have E. coli, and if you actually did eat Romaine lettuce last night, you probably do have E. coli, so you won’t even be lying.
Either way, best of luck on your day off.